Diver: Sydney, Bjork and some other guy from Ye Olde Schoolhouse

Facts:This trio offers alcohol-fueled advice from the North County


Got a dirty little secret?
Looking for guidance to remedy a sticky situation?

Seek help from the master of the kitchen! The Dish Diver has solutions to life's little messes. Send your problems to "Ask the Diver." - By mail to Durango Telegraph - Attn Diver -534 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301; by email at telegraph@durangotelegraph.com, or by fax at 259-0448.


My husband and I were traveling to Mexico recently and flew through Las Vegas. During our hour-long layover, he gambled away about 300 bucks and got piss-drunk. He then became belligerent, and they wouldn’t let him on the plane. This was our vacation, I went ahead and got on the plane without him. I thought maybe after he sobered up he’d catch another flight, but instead he flew back home. I had a great time in Mexico, alone (I wouldn’t let him ruin my vacation) but now he’s very angry, and says I ditched him. Do you think I did?

– Mary


We’re inclined to say your husband is a dumbass. Vegas can certainly turn a good-natured, considerate, loving spouse into one, regardless of how little time is spent in Sin City. However, you married the dumbass ... so perhaps it is YOU who is the dumbass. That, or you are feeling the delicate sting of guilt that comes with an extramarital affair after one too many rum/tequila beverages. But to more accurately answer the questioned posed: We don’t care one way or another if you ditched him, and more importantly neither do you.

– The Divers Three

Dear Diver,    

Do you think DMR management should go visit some other ski resorts to learn how to run a lift line?

– R. Steel

Dear Remington,

It is with every ounce of restraint that we keep our answer to this loaded question under a two-page diatribe. Given our proximity to said resort gives us a unique perspective on all things DMR. We hear and see things some may not want us to see and hear. To answer your question: Could DMR Management learn a thing or two from a visit to another other ski resort? We simply reply: No s**t.

– Divers


What’s the best way to teach someone a lesson? I keep hoping my “friend” will learn from various mistakes he makes, which in turn keep hurting our relationship, but it ain’t working. I need stronger tactics. Got any suggestions?

– Jenny


This question bores us. We’re still mulling over Question No. 2 and whether or not to use this space to continue our answer. Sorry. Nothing personal. Easy fix: Go buy a new friend.

– B & S & J

In this week's issue...

January 25, 2024
Bagging it

State plastic bag ban is in full effect, but enforcement varies

January 26, 2024
Paper chase

The Sneer is back – and no we’re not talking about Billy Idol’s comeback tour.

January 11, 2024
High and dry

New state climate report projects continued warming, declining streamflows