Diver: Harrison McInnis
Interesting fact: Harrison is currently the only person in Durango to still ride a Y bike with no hint of irony

 

Dear Diver,

I know texting while driving is a no-no, but what about texting while walking? In my opinion, it's just as dangerous. The other day, I had to dive out of the way of a woman while she was walking down the sidewalk and texting. And then she walked right into the intersection and damned near got killed. I see this kind of stuff happen all the time. Shouldn't there be a law?

– Petrified Pedestrian

Dear Durango Driver,

First off, driving on the sidewalk is a big no-no. I agree, there should be a law. The law should state, all pedestrians must wear Google Glasses. That way they'll never have to look down while checking Facebook for the third time since last crossing the street. 

– The Diver

 

Dear Diver,

What ever happened to "Glamour Shots?" They were all the rage about 10 or 15 years ago, and then, like a burst of Aqua Net, they were gone. Poof. The reason I'm asking is, I'd like to get mine done. Preferably at the mall.

– Glamour Girl

Dear Glam Gurl, 

Good thing you said preferably, because malls don't do this anymore. Thankfully I know a guy who still has a studio set up to take glamour shots. It's parked near Schneider Park after dark and sometimes behind Park Elementary after school. He doesn't even charge! Also, thanks for helping me name my next mixed drink, "Glamour Shot."

– The Diver

Dear Diver,

This old friend of mine, I'll call her "Beth," recently changed her name, claiming she never liked her parent-given name and that is was too "boring." She now wants to be called "Moonbeam." Obviously, the transition has been a little awkward. Please give me tips for dealing, I am not good with change, especially when it comes to names.

– Tongue Tied

Dear Name Change,

First off Moonbeam is soooo boring and not very original, it's not much better than "Beth." Help her come up with a better name, suggest names you would prefer to call her. Try names like Petalsniffer, Honeynugget, Doobieblossom, or my favorite Dankdazy. If she's not willing to change for you, she isn't a real friend.

– The Diver