Duke City, All Hallows Eve and Tuesday

by Chris Aaland

There’s a dark, evil underbelly of Albuquerque that nobody acknowledges. No, I’m not referring to murder, meth and airport carjackings. I’m talking about the dirty secret that even KASA Fox 2 omits from its nightly recap of shootings, robberies and drunks facing their seventh DUIs.

As Dave, Jared, Kim and I staggered back to our motel rooms from the Metallica blitzkrieg across the street at Tingley Coliseum – more because of back and knee pain sustained in the mosh pit than the Crown Royal shots and Bud Lights that were consumed – we came head to head with that very beast. Thursday night is Karaoke Night at the Barcelona Suites. 9 p.m. ’til 1 a.m., like clockwork.

Karaoke has always bothered me, but the Duke City’s finest were a sight to see. We were spellbound by the skinny, 6-foot-something in a black duster and cowboy hat belting out Huey Lewis & the News, awed by the athletic-built, argyle-sweater-vested Eagles crooner, and floored by the usual diva wannabes busting out their best Janet Jacksons. Off key? Oh, hell yeah. But when the weight-challenged girl in the gold-sequined shirt serenaded the dozens of Metallica fans who were buying overpriced post-concert beers (although less than half the price of the $8.50 pints at Tingley), it was on. Enter Sandman.

Wherever you may roam, karaoke attracts the same college RA geeks, Dungeons & Dragons nerds and porky Pavarottis, singing along while some Top 40 DJ spins the soundtracks to their lives. The tables closest to the stage overflow with empty Michelob Ultra bottles, while whiskey-guzzling voyeurs like our quartet hide in the shadows.

As we drove home the next day, hungover, tired and sore, we were less bothered by the previous night’s display of American Idolism than the thought of thousands of McCain-Palin idolaters cramming onto the Durango High School football field that afternoon. While both groups may seem out of touch, the Thursday night gang at the Barcelona is Ugly America at its finest. Normal? These guys are Joe the Plumber, and karaoke is their way to fight back, dusters, argyle, sequins and all.

You don’t have to brush up on “Like a Virgin” and drive to Albuquerque for karaoke to dress up this week. Tomorrow night is Halloween and there are countless events worth your time. Remember: Halloween is the biggest social night of the year for little kids going trick or treating. Otto will be one of them. Please consider this before getting behind the wheel.

An annual tradition is KDUR’s Transvestite Ball, scheduled to begin at 9 p.m. Halloween night at the Abbey Theatre. This year’s theme is the “Twisted World of Diznay” and features Jonezy, Mr. Anderson, Niko and a cinematic performance by Alex Oliszewski and Stacey Sotosky. Costume contest prizes will be awarded at midnight. Sorry junior, it’s strictly 21-and-over.

Most of you know “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” What you might not know is that the film was adapted from Richard O’Brien’s London stage production, “The Rocky Horror Show.” It continues its four-night run at the Henry Strater Theatre at 7:30 p.m. tonight (Thursday) and concludes Friday. Do the Time Warp!

Local bluegrass bands the Hot Strings and Waiting on Trial perform at the Carvers Halloween Bash at 9 p.m. A costume contest and keg giveaway are also on tap.

The Summit’s Halloween party includes a solo set by Eric Kiefer at 6 p.m., a DJ playing ’70s and ’80s tunes at 8 p.m., and live music by the Sweats and Aftergrass at 10 p.m. A Halloween costume contest starts at midnight. Warm up for the event at the Summit tonight with a pre-Halloween party featuring more ’70s and ’80s tunes.

Steamworks’ Halloween extravaganza features Ska, afro-beat and reggae by Liquid Cheese, a costume contest, a VIP lounge sponsored by The Point and more. The costume contest begins around 10 p.m., following the first set by Liquid Cheese.

Larry Carver & Jack Ellis class up Halloween by playing the Diamond Belle Saloon at 6 p.m. on Friday and Saturday. The two-night stand marks the first of what will become something of a regular Diamond Belle gig for the duo.

The second annual El Ranchoween starts at 7 p.m. Saturday (didn’t they get the memo that Halloween is on Friday?) and features live music by the Lawn Chair Kings and Inferno’s costume contest.

KSUT celebrates its 15th annual membership party and silent auction from 5: 30-9 p.m. Saturday at the Ska Brewing World Headquarters in Bodo Park. For $40 you’ll get a seat at the bidding table, food from Durangourmet, wine from Wagon Wheel Liquors, and Ska brews. My living room is decorated with assorted autographed album art I’ve acquired at this thing. You never know when you’ll need that Nitty Gritty Dirt Band lithograph … mine stares at me daily.

J. Wail brings his “Tour de Bliss” to the Summit on Saturday. The Phoenix-based DJ blends club, funk and live electronics.

Telluride’s Hillbilly Hotel plays rock, soul and Americana at Steamworks at 10 p.m. Saturday.

And then there’s Tuesday. Get out and vote! The La Plata Democrats host election night at the Abbey starting at 6:30 p.m. Watch the local, state and national returns come in.

This week’s Top Shelf list offers 10 things I’m wishing for on Tuesday:

1. One word: Obama!

2. A resounding defeat of Amendment 48, keeping our laws off women’s bodies

3. A John Salazar victory in Colorado’s 3rd Congressional District – he’s earned another term

4. A Mark Udall win in Colorado’s U.S. Senate race – education and the environment need him

5. The Queen of the hate-mongers, Marilyn Musgrave, being elected out of office in Colorado’s 4th Congressional District

6. A resounding win for Amendment 59. TABOR has gutted higher education in Colorado. An educated workforce goes a long way to rebuilding our economy.

7. No more election advertising. I wish the national campaigns were as classy as our local ones, which speaks volumes about our county commissioner candidates, regardless of their party.

8. Defeats for Amendments 47, 49 and 54. Union labor built this country.

9. Hope

10. Peace

Get out of the new road if you can’t lend a hand. E-mail me at chrisa@gobrainstorm.net •