Apple Talk

by Chef Boy Ari

She drove north from town to the derelict homestead, whose owner had recently died. The dead man’s wife had died years before. Signs of neglect at the old homestead were everywhere. The tired buildings leaned and sagged, rusted farming implements and wagon parts were strewn about, sometimes half swallowed by the earth. The apple orchard had been feral for more than 40 years. But somehow all the unpruned years failed to stop those twisted forms from producing a bumper crop.

“The apples were as big as babies’ heads,” remembers the young woman, “and the trees were completely overloaded. The contrast between the abundance on the trees and the dereliction everywhere else was stunning.”

Investigating further, she found herself in the old homestead kitchen, last used in 1946 and sporting half a century’s dust. In a drawer there was a box of recipes, some hand written, others clipped from magazines – like the “Futurist Sandwich” recipe from Ladies’ Home Journal, which involved three types of bread cut into geometric shapes, abstract art for your tea party. Piled in with the yellowing recipes was a booklet, , published by the Northern Pacific Railroad in the early 1900s.

By that time, Northern Pacific rails reached into the heart of western apple country, including the Bitterroot and Flathead valleys of Montana, the Snake River country of Idaho, Washington’s Inland Empire, and Oregon’s Willamette Valley. The pamphlet that was buried under a stack of dusty recipes seemed to be industry’s attempt to increase apple cargo on the railroads. By waxing ecstatic upon the pleasures and health benefits of apples, Northern Pacific hoped to wet the public’s appetite for the fruit.

“Apples contain as great food values as meat,” claims the booklet. “The fruit should be eaten to a much greater extent than it is at present, because it is nutritious and wholesome.”

For its poetic charms and flowery prose, the pages of could have forced a smile from the likes of Henry David Thoreau – although his preferred flavor of apple, a wild apple that’s “sour enough to set a squirrel’s teeth on edge and make a jay scream,” is a far cry from the domesticated version celebrated in Apple Talk.

“Bursting into fragrant bloom and bud in May, the tree then elaborated its sap into the flesh of the apple and flavored it with sugar, spiced it with wine and wrapped it in its thin but tough integument,” the pamphlet explains. “The breezes fanned it, the showers baptized it, the sun kissed the dew and watched over it and the solar system cradled it in its care.”

The authors recommend purchasing apples in season and in bulk, thereby getting the most apple for your buck. “Proper storage for the apple consists of keeping the boxes where the atmosphere is dry, cool, and subject to as little variation in temperature as possible. A small room can be partitioned off in the basement and, if possible, should have an outside window to assist in proper ventilation.”

As advertised on the cover, Apple Talk contains 55 recipes for serving the apple, including such tried-and-true standards as Apple Dumplings, Apple Charlotte, Apple Sauce Cake, as well as more obscure presentations like Bird’s Nest Pudding and Fig-stuffed Apples. There is also a recipe for Apple Tapioca, which might come as a surprise to some, while others knowingly nod their heads. Some of the best apple pies contain tapioca. Soak your tapioca fully before mixing it in with your pie filling. Or use instant tapioca, no soaking necessary.

I tried the recipe for Apple Custard and must unfortunately report that it isn’t something I’ll be making again, except maybe for George Bush. It looked like something from the homestead’s outhouse, and didn’t taste much better.

Redemption was quick to arrive, however, in the form of Indian Pudding with Apples. And let me assure you, it takes a top-notch Indian Pudding to impress this Chef Boy. I grew up in New England, where Indian Pudding still lurks on menus and is served in country kitchens. Although it isn’t actually an Indian recipe adapted by settlers, as commonly believed, Indian Pudding contains corn. Back in the day, if it contained corn, it was associated with Native Americans.

Here is the Apple Talk recipe for Apple Indian Pudding: “Scald (that means almost boil) 2 quarts of sweet milk. (If you don’t have sweet milk, go with whole milk.) Stir in 1 cup of cornmeal until the mixture thickens. Remove from the fire. Add 1 and one-sixth cups of molasses, 1 teaspoon of salt, ½ teaspoon each of nutmeg and cinnamon and 2 cups of sweet apples, pared, cored and quartered. Pour into a deep pudding dish and bake for four hours. (A temperature recommendation here would be nice. I went with 275, and it was perfect.) When the pudding has baked for one and one-half hours, add without stirring, one pint of cold milk. Serve with cream and sugar and syrup.”

Ice cream goes very well with this dish as well. You can also substitute some of the molasses for maple syrup. Or you could use less molasses and pour maple syrup on top when serving it. And you can definitely double or triple the amount of apples. It’s a pretty forgiving recipe. •