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Dear Diver,
What's the story with hip kids, teen-agers or adults who think it's cool to ridicule people who may be more "geeky?"
We all know to be truly "cool" is to not act cool at all! Kids who put their hair in Mohawks to be "punk" are in fact
not punk at all.
- Thanks,
Jack
Hi Jack,
I actually think "we all" DO NOT KNOW that to be "truly cool" is to not act cool at all. "Cool" is such a vague
description and is interpreted different by each and every human being. There is no way we could all see on the same
level of coolness. The ridiculing thing is just part of human nature. I still ridicule Joe Montana for doing LA Gear
shoe ads, but that is because I was raised under the banner of glory. Sorry Jack, my mind has been sidetracked by
Elway. I must now end.
- Diver
Dearest Diver,
My son just turned 18, and I must admit, he's disgusting. He doesn't shower. He doesn't brush his teeth, and he
wonders why girls don't like him! He's gross. I've read in this column before about how people feel violated by
others that smell, and I share that sentiment. What can I do to get this kid to improve his hygiene?
- Mother to a smelly son
Mom,
The kid is 18, by now you've lost the chance to influence his hygienic habits. He is now a self proclaimed "man" and
is free to do as he pleases. Second, chances are the little stanky-Franky didn't have any clean-Carls to look up to
as a pre-pubescent young lad. The influential water is under the bridge, cross your fingers and send him positive
vibes in his journey to manhood. Buy the kid a bike while you're at it! Then he'll have a good reason to be stinky.
- Diver
Diver,
This town needs a couple good, ol' fashioned tractor pulls. Less hippies, more rednecks! Less patchouli and
microbrews, more bare-breasted, fat women and cold, canned beer. Now that's Americana!
- BJ in Durango |
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Diver: Chad Cheeney from the VOA Thriftstore
Facts: Chad is a true diver, a dumpster diver.
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Got a dirty little secret?
Looking for guidance to remedy a sticky situation?
Seek help from the master of the kitchen! The Dish Diver has solutions
to life's little messes. Send your problems to "Ask
the Diver." - By mail to Durango Telegraph - Attn
Diver -534 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301; by email at
telegraph@durangotelegraph.com,
or by fax at 259-0448. |
Hey there BJ,
Tractor pulls are for sissies who can only dream of scoring fat, bare-breasted women, as they sip their cold, canned
beer. There is no need for that kind of dung. However, this Americana thing you so desire is right around the corner.
The redneck thing is up and running all over this diverse country. Your best bet is to move to some land where that
kind of poo takes place all around you. Then you will find happiness keep it greasy BJ!
- Diver
Diver,
My mom needs to leave me alone! I have no privacy, and she's constantly butting in on what I do. What can I do to get
her to leave me alone? I'm 13.
- Laura
Dearest Laura,
Does your mother know of your woes? At 13, it is a far-off concept of setting boundaries with your parents, but you
need to confront your feelings and communicate with your mommie dearest. I'm guessing she just loves the pits out of
ya and has no idea it bothers you so. If it's driving you crazy, let her know. That is all you can do. And say "no"
to cigarettes.
- Thanks,
Diver
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