What’s a good response when a potential boyfriend
asks the number of people you’ve ever been with? In my
case, the truth stings, but for other single ladies out there,
what should be the “proper” answer?
– Questioning, no regrets
P.S. Diving is excellent.
A good response would be to be honest. Everybody has a past
that is their own business. Anyone that’s going to judge
your past is lame anyway. For me, as long as your “number”
isn’t increasing by more than me while we’re together,
the past is done. You might want to see a doctor about that
sting though; passing on the sting is real rude.
P.S. Mmm... diving.
Why don’t people who
ride road bicycles observe traffic laws? Do they have to? I’m
talking about road cyclist athlete types and the typical person
blowing through the stop signs at Eighth Street and Third Ave.
It’s crazy out there.
– Barrett, via e-mail
In the case of the “road cyclist athlete types,”
it is because they are way higher on the social and evolutionary
ladders. Just ask them. As for the typical person blowing through
the stop signs at Eighth and Third, natural selection has a
funny way of eventually taking care of them. I relish every
stop sign. If nothing else, it’s an opportunity to smoke.
How do I keep my kids from “web surfing”
to inappropriate pages? There are so many disgusting web sites
it sickens me, and it seems like any type of parental block
program doesn’t work. There is just too much smut. What
can I do, because there is good stuff on the internet as well?
– Miffed Mom
Too much smut? The only real solution would be to kill your
computer. I thought the smut was the good stuff on the internet.
Perhaps there is an Amish military school you could enroll them
in. Check the web. Start your search with “smut free Amish,”
yousure to find something informative.
– Good luck, Diver
Facts: From diving at an upscale
deli in North Durango, Squeak has become well versed in
computers, natural disasters and the doling out of semi-decent
Got a dirty little secret?
Looking for guidance to remedy a sticky situation?
Seek help from the master of the kitchen! The Dish Diver has solutions
to life's little messes. Send your problems to "Ask
the Diver." - By mail to Durango Telegraph - Attn
Diver -534 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301; by email at
or by fax at 259-0448.
Is Durango due for a flood anytime soon? I just
bought a house by the river and now I’m getting concerned.
What about that “hundred-year flood” thing?
There are no floods, rock falls, fires or any other sort of
natural disasters here in Durango. Hundred-year flood thing?
That’s a rumor started by hippies. If you’re really
concerned, your house should be worth $7 million in a couple
of weeks and you can move to Silverton, a beautiful town where
they never have avalanches.
– See ya, Diver