I’ve been dating this very attractive girl
who is very liberal in her beliefs and lifestyle. She’s
a vegetarian, hates George Bush and is open to many new things.
I am open to new things as well, but I am not a vegetarian and
am a Republican. However, I told her I’m a vegetarian
months ago, and it’s becoming too hard to fake it when
we go out to dinner. Basically I’m sick of eating salad.
If I tell her I’m not a vegetarian though, I think she’ll
be really pissed. Should I just come clean or perhaps take her
out to a restaurant that doesn’t serve tofu and surprise
– Jim, via e-mail
Has it occurred to you that she’s attractive BECAUSE
she’s progressive, healthy and aware? Seems to me you’re
way out of your league on this one, my friend. I’m just
surprised that someone of her caliber allowed herself to be
duped by a lying liar like yourself. On the bright side, however,
when I hear a Republican say “it’s getting hard
to fake it,” I sense hope. Consider the immortal words
of Mark Twain, “I tell the truth because there’s
less to remember.”
– Thanks, Diver
Is there a secret to obtaining eternal happiness?
– Your friend, Beth
There is no secret to attaining enlightenment or “eternal
happiness” as you like to say. All suffering is self induced.
Get over yourself.
– Yours in equanimity, The Diver
It seems to me that many people have no common sense.
In other words, so called common sense is not very common at
all. Or should we understand common as meaning crude, low brow
and vulgar? There seems to be a lot of that “common”
sense, would you agree? Pull no punches.
– Sincerely, VT Olson
There is nothing common about wanting to understand the nature
of common sense. “Common folk,” if you will, rarely
find time to ponder such questions. Instead, they busy themselves
with such dilemmas as eating “ethically” or whether
or not so-and-so really did have his way with what’s her
name at some fancy resort upstate. While it’s common to
seek answers to questions, sometimes people with elitist inclinations
attempt to validate themselves through advice columns in local,
independent newspapers. I encourage you to employ a little common
sense yourself and avoid asking total strangers for insight
in the future. I hope this helps.
– The Diver
Denny from The Abbey Theatre
Facts: This Diver has cleaned
dishes in numerous establishments in the area, including
KSUT and a number of restaurants that still allow smoking.
Got a dirty little secret?
Looking for guidance to remedy a sticky situation?
Seek help from the master of the kitchen! The Dish Diver has solutions
to life's little messes. Send your problems to "Ask
the Diver." - By mail to Durango Telegraph - Attn
Diver -534 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301; by email at
or by fax at 259-0448.
When The Beatles were popular, did
more “sophisticated” music fans ridicule them,
much like "sophisticated” music fans ridicule N-Sync?
It’s all “pop” isn’t it?
– BL, Hermosa
No, BL, which I assume stands for Brain Less,
it’s not all just pop. We rail Kenny G today, but does
that make John Coltrane contemptible? I think not. You see,
like any thing in life (jazz music, Thai food, internet porn),
the world of pop music offers both the good and the bad. Pop
does not have to be a negative concept, Big Loser. Pop can
be an experience as joyous and fulfilling as not getting caught
looking at internet porn. Don’t believe me? Give a listen
to bands like Badfinger, Big Star, The Jayhawks or Wilco.
Lastly, it doesn’t take much sophistication to ridicule
*NSYNC, usually a 16th birthday is all one needs to realize
the sheer lameness of such a group.
– Truly, Diver