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by Mike Sheahan
 Anyone
who was out of doors around midnight last Sunday is aware that
our government is once again up to its usual tricks. As I strolled
the streets of my neighborhood, with one eye out for vandals,
I looked up at the immense half moon only to find it criss-crossed
in a perfect “X” by more lousy chemtrails. A pox
on you, my United States Government for (in my best Scooby Doo
voice) using you power for evil instead of good. I’m being
facetious of course, our government may well be sinister, but
I’m pretty sure it’s not spending unaccounted millions
in order to spray its people with deadly chemicals. That kind
of thing is so Middle East. A lot of us do believe however –
a simple Web search for “chemtrails’” delivered
more than 17,000 results, and in two of the biggest sites there
are message boards with posts by Southwest Coloradans. If you
are curious, check out www.chemtrail central.com. It’s
good, at least, for a laugh.
 If
what you really want is to stop gaining weight while surfing
meaningless Web sites, then The Goods is here for you. The Summit
has a big weekend in store beginning Friday night with Durango’s
new favorite band, Freewill Recovery. Part jam band, part classic
rock, part smoke machine, Freewill Recovery has fast become
the “everybody’s gonna be there” band in Durango.
Show time is 9:30 p.m., and everyone is gonna be there.
Saturday night at the Summit will feature “gritty American
pop” band Blue Trick. I know very little about the band’s
music (I’ve heard a couple of Internet snippets), but
I think this trio should be seen. They have a very heartland,
pop-rock sound that reminds me of a personal favorite with the
same color in its name, Blue Mountain. Given what I’ve
heard, this show seems like the sleeper secret of the week.
Speaking of bands I know nothing about, Steamworks plays host
to a group called Raw Materials on Friday. They bill themselves
as “garage grass,” and that sounds intriguing at
the least. The cover is a mere three bucks, whadda ya got to
lose?
Calling all ladies! On Monday, May 19, the only legal “Men
of Playgirl” revue will bring its North American Outlaw
tour to Scoot ’n Blues. This is your chance, girls, to
get as housed and sexually obnoxious as you think your boyfriend
gets when he says he’s going golfing at that country club
right next to Foxtails in Farmington. Too bad for potential
male audience members, as the Playgirl show is advertised for
“ladies only.” That stipulation has led me to wonder
who actually buys Playgirl magazine, and I would bet that Playgirl’s
largest audience is not single (or married) women. The boy strippers
begin at 8 p.m., and I’m sure the bar will have plenty
of singles on hand. Or, do what us fellows do: Print up some
fake singles. You’ll be long gone before anyone knows
what’s up.
Every town, no matter its size, needs some sort of all-ages
venue. If the youth of Durango didn’t have a place like
the Shred Shed to hang out in and see punk rock shows, I’m
sure the number of TP jobs at the jock’s houses would
spike overnight. My hat is off to the Shred Shed and a college
club called FLCpunx for continuing to provide a place that keeps
kids out of my damn yard. If you are afraid of the all-ages
punk show menace, I’ve had occasion to meet several of
these kids, and they’re not all that different than your
Football Johnny or Cheerleader Suzy. Sometimes they even get
jobs as newspaper columnists. Oh yeah, there’s a whole
mess of all-ages punk rock at the Shred Shed on Monday, the
19th, starting at 8:30 p.m. You should feel okay if your kid’s
going.
This week’s sign the end is near: This week’s contribution
comes from fellow Telegraph contributor, one SeF1or Liggett.
It seems that one-time hip hop superstar Snoop Doggy Dogg, aka
Snoop Dog, now has his own show on MTV called “Doggy Fizzle
Televizzle.” Calvin Broadaus was once on the blade of
hip hop, but then he made a couple of “Girls Gone Wild”
videos and now has an MTV show that seems to cement his descent
into the cartoon land of ironic stars. “Next week tune
into a very special ‘Anna Nicole,’ and see Snoop
Dogg and Bobby Trendy kiss and make up.”
This week’s album review that is a movie: Hey you! Put
down this paper and go see “A Mighty Wind” at the
Gaslight Theater. For some reason the TransLux folks have deemed
us Durangoans savvy enough to warrant a visit by the latest
Christopher Guest/Eugene Levy writing collaboration. If you
are familiar with the mockumentary styles of “Waiting
For Guffman,” “Best In Show” and (to a lesser
degree) “This is Spinal Tap,” then you know exactly
what to expect. There is no slapstick or physical humor in this
send up of the world of folk music which “saw its birth
in the late ’50s and reached its zenith in the early ’60s.”
Guest’s regular cast of characters is all here. Parker
Posey has a scene stealing small role as a one-time street urchin
turned into an overly bubbly folkie. Fred Willard turns in a
hilarious performance as the washed up one-liner comic manager
of one of the bands. But the best scenes come when actors Guest,
Michael McKean and Harry Shearer, as members of the “band”
the Folksmen, seem to be riffing on one another. In fact, it
seems as if Guest told all his actors to ad-lib, and that spur
of the moment feel lends “A Mighty Wind,” like all
his movies, an air of reality. Hey, I said put the paper down.
Go see this movie.
What’s worse, chemtrails or Snoop Dog? mpsheahan@yahoo.com
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